IndiBlogger Chennai meet

After July 2010, it was April 2011 and after that Now. I really thought people joked when they said "Enjoy until you can sonny". I used to wonder why can't one enjoy when he/she is working. Is it that hard to have a personal life going on in parallel as well? I mean the kinda personal life you want.

I've realized a few things in the past one year. Striking the balance is always the problem. And when the control shifts, there are always sacrifices. And you, my crappy blog were also a necessary sacrifice.

I do notice the fellow bloggers i used to follow have been regular. I also noticed that Blogger itself has changed. I also also noticed the mail about the IndiBlogger meet at Chennai and so i registered.

I was of the illusion that being an ex-blogger, i am gonna be a sitting duck in that meetup. But after seeing the attendees list, it won't be a waste of my time after all.

Now lets see some faces.
1. Vipul grover - The marshal. Eager to meet sirji.
2. Shankar Ganapathy - Machan!!
3. Shyam H N - I dont even follow your blog. But i know you.
4. Ratz - I followed your blog and your tweets. But i dont know whether i would be able to spot you.

Anyone else reading this attending? Do drop in a comment.

Life in a Bucket

Hello my tiny little dump of frustration. Its been a while. Sane and Insane things have happened. And this is yet another insane thing.

They say that your life flashes in a few seconds the moment you know that you are going to die. I've always wondered whether this compression in the Time dimension was possible or not. Mathematically, one can't convert many years into a few seconds you see. After a particular insane incident, i realized that it was practically viable although theoretically incorrect. The life flashing happens only in the circumstantial situation of facing death. Now, when one is absolutely not involved in suicide or any other accident for that matter, can this Life flashing occur? Well, it happened again and this time while i took a closer look at a non-living object.

Life

The above pic is the bucket in my bathroom. The letters CK which are in red caught my eye. Being a Liverpool fan, the first time i hated the red coloration. For a guy who is poor on acronyms, it is very ironical that he noticed this.

BU - The last 2 letters of the project that am currently working on.

CK - The place where i reside currently in kolkata - Near CK market in Salt lake city.

ET - Thats the wretched branch in my Engineering - Electronics and Telecommunication.

And thats how ladies and gentlemen, how one's life flashes on seeing a Non-living object. A real death like experience from a bucket!!

P.S: Why should me of all persons go for a bath on a holiday?

P.P.S: You are free to share your special non-living thing. If it happens to be a D**DO, i would give them a special gift. Whether the D**DO is a non-living thing or a living thing is entirely out of scope.

Making fun of pune

Its been a very very long time.. blogger blocked at office.. no net at home and am on the roam always.. no time.. although i blog at cognizant's blogs which u guys cant view i guess.. so i'll be posting whatever i post there here too.. lets start with some humor i say..

Disclaimer: The below post is targeted at an open minded audience.. It has been rated by the blogging censor board as U/A with more emphasis on the A.. Its totally upto the readers’s discretion now..



A true chennaite guy working in pune mostly tries to make fun of either the people or the culture.. This time he happens to notice all the hoardings and funny names on the way from hinjewadi to warje on the mumbai-pune national highway.. sitting on any window seat on the right side of the bus, one could note the following in the very same order.. most of them are adverts for constructions and speciality homes or the names of restaurants.. here it goes..



1. Honey’s Punjabi Spice Hotel /* an oxymoronic hotel.. how can there be honey and spice in a punjabi hotel?? looks like the owner is a kashmiri who makes good kashmiri pulavs..



2. Now get a window seat for all -eisha /* consider a bus.. how can everyone get a window seat.. rather consider an auto.. there are only 2 window seats.. these advertisers are fooling people to the core i say..



3. Apostrophe homes /* i just hope that they dont make catastrophical homes..



4. Some pleasures are personal /* ya right.. if i could ask the advertiser who got this tagline jus 1 question i would ask.. “would u care to elaborate??”.. a tagline can be abstract but definitely not this abstract which can lead to a lot of ambiguities.. just notice the “some”.. i dunno whether i should elaborate..



5. Add spice to your flavour /*no comments



6. Why go out when there is a sport inside? /* do they intend to mean the “instrument” when they say sport inside.. which implies they prefer the m-word over the s-word.. and yet again they are trying to convert us into couch-potatoes..



7. Live with natural airconditioning /* i say “get out the house and go for a walk”



8. After the Royal duties, u deserve some kingly leisure /* what royal duties?? what kind of leisure is kingly??



9. Punjab Exotica /* excooz mee puleese.. erotica?? Do punjabis want us to make fun of them?? Or are they really that stupid..



10.VITS - Guest Best Rest /* Ah.. Next..



11. The best: SAI ERECTORS.. /* Russell peters style “so i go inside the office and ask ‘hey buddy, i gotta problem err.. down here.. i heard u guys are the best in the business.. so could u like umm.. erect it’ and those would be the last words i would ever say in that office..”



P.S: The comments have been added by the author’s alter ego.. so just make sure you read them before the author finds out..

Philosophical highness, ur highness

2 random thoughts after getting pretty high..

1. the occasion is my bday party which was in february.. drunk enough to be sane and high.. some topic about religion came by.. i started thinking abt the relation between god and luck.. when i told my dad.. i dont believe in god or his mind games.. he said "even though u control ur life to a maximum extent, at times u kinda feel that some supernatural force intervenes and takes the control out of ur hands".. i kinda agreed and said "that is what pple call luck".. he replied by saying " wats wrong in pple calling it god".. the discussion stopped since it was going nowhere.. so its like this.. even though our life is under the control of ur own microprocessor, a master controller always exists.. speaking technically, the god human relation is analogous to the master slave system.. a potter is an artist who amazes me a lot.. consider the potter to be god.. man is represented by clay.. the potter with his fingers tries to shape the clay.. the fingers could be said to be ur parents, friends.. all those who make what u are.. i would say it is the potters decision to introduce the right fingers at the right time in order to make the perfect pot.. the potter also has a tendency to screw up the pot either accidentally or purposefully.. as always, my mind routed to the movie matrix.. a purposeful screwing up is made by the potter coz that what humans seek which was the result of the first matrix.. they dont want complete happiness.. an accidental screwing up maybe compared to as a glitch or bug in the matrix.. no more complications hereafter coz we went to tapri.. free..

2. the classy second time grassy experience.. i was literally blabbering anything and everything to sundar in the terrace.. then we came down.. me and sundar played pocket tanks deluxe.. almost everytime sundar will win.. in a situation where i was unable to literally hold the mouse and change power and direction, i won all the games.. talk abt irony of the game.. then played with soin successfully hiding my highness.. won of course.. came outside the house to stand in front of the gate to chat with sundar again.. the street light is glaring.. unable to see it directly, i bend down to see my shadow instead.. while i was still jabbering, this parallel thought process was running in my mind.. a shadow is a portrayal of ur outer face.. the mask that each person is wearing is ur shadow.. the real body is ur inner true self.. although u feel there are a lot of similarities between the inner self and the masked zorro, think again coz the shadow and the body have a very small intersection.. if there is an action or a cause, which will give the reaction or the effect - the shadow or the body.. after death, the shadow remains where as the body disappears.. who to put the blame on -  the Creator or the Creation???

i'll finish off with some thing which happened few minutes back.. went to tapri.. mama(shobhith) was totally high.. it shd have been the purified water or the smell of tea coupled with exam tension.. these are the things he said..
1. gandhiji said "after u throw stones at some 1, u shd go and kiss them" (for throwing pebbles at a dog)
2. mappu, yellow kottai da mela.. (referring to the street light)
3. mappu, nakku kulla otta.. (hole in the tongue)..

The Blister Exists

Me and my dad rarely do this "guy talk"..once.. he told a peculiar thing about marriage.. i dont think its an experience from his personal life.. maybe from his experience of having seen so many married people.. he stated that life after marriage is divided into 3 phases.. enthusiastic phase, boring phase and rest of ur life phase.. the first phase is very obvious.. the couples get to know each other.. they have sex.. they get a child.. life goes on as they take care of their child.. this phase could be very short if the couple decide not to have a child right after marriage.. then comes this time period where each becomes kinda sick of seeing each other's face daily.. my dad said that if the couple dont have any common interests.. then this period can be very very boring and may lead to a divorce.. if u could cross this phase then the rest of ur life shd be pleasant.. now i should be a total idiot if am goin to talk abt marriage so early in my life.. so change of topic..

i have noticed that common interests have played a major role in most of my friendships.. i feel that more the common interests, thicker is the friendship.. most of u may disagree with this at first sight.. but its something thats always there and we've just blindly failed to notice it..although there are exceptions, almost all my close friends will share atleast 2 of the following things..

1. football
2. rock/metal music
3. socialism in the form smoking and drinking

this is the situation now.. the first 2 have been ever present.. but the 3rd one started only in the 3rd year of my college.. when i try to resolve order out of chaos given an everchanging me and everchanging acquaintances .. i just hit the great wall.. so its like this.. i wasnt like very close to the socialism people at that time even though they belonged to "the gang".. but now things have changed after i started socialism.. i have become close with few.. i have totally lost touch with few.. what is the cause for this blister.. this aberration.. is it just me or is it the circumstances is what puzzles me the most.. atleast i know the answer as to why we follow this common interests policy..
figuratively speaking, suppose you are stuck in a desert.. would you be happy to see a human or any animal?
we tend to be happy surrounded by our own kind; people who have the same mind set and interests as ours rather than different people..

confused, i leave u confused..
                                      -- confucius

gate pass

This one is a little old.. its back from the drafts.. so i am mixing it with the latest info..
Last sunday i learned a lot.. since i didnt want to waste the already wasted 800 bucks.. and since a dirty mind shd never be kept idle.. i went to write the gate exam as a time pass and to keep my mind working.. i had to go alone since i had a different centre.. took bath and started off early.. i kept on thinking that my centre was at bata, raipur instead of kapa,raipur.. google maps screwed me big time and i was lost.. so went and got a cigarette.. asked the shop guy itself for directions.. while he was trying to explain.. another guy who was smoking there intervened and asked me whether i was going to write gate..after my affirmation.. he offered me a ride.. i gleefully accepted and he dropped me off some 200m back.. told tata and walked.. found the centre,  but none from my college.. scavenged the area for another tea shop.. having a puff before an exam seems to be my lucky charm.. i got a personal high this time in 7th sem.. consequences of the lucky charm.. i knew i would not no anything technical.. so straight away went for the aptitude.. finished it right away.. too much of analog circuits.. all i could was transistors.. at one point.. i was stuck in finding the inverse laplace transform.. cursed myself.. finished it early.. was observing the reactions of fellow roommates.. the girl sitting next to me had done an aptitude question wrong.. helped her..see generosity.. she thanked me after the exam and i was jus talkin to her till we came outside.. the villain(read: her dad) was waiting outside.. left n came off.. what a way to celebrate a stupid day..

was full of guilty consciences that i didnt give the deserved respect and dedication to engineering.. engineering has taught me so much in life.. but nothing related to engineering.. rather than saying i am not fit to be an engineer.. i would say.. i should have never tried to become one.. i had so much interest in biology.. am a total admirer of the human body.. its so vulnerable to any attack but still we live on.. the complexities of the human brain puzzle me all the time especially during booze.. having got 93 marks in cbse biology with an out and out IIT preparation is something to be proud of.. i shd hav bcum a doctor.. i still wonder y i did not give any medical exams.. left them all.. so here i am coz everyone told me that only an idiot would leave an engineering seat in an NIT.. i hav come to the very end of it.. i always felt that till school, my life was never in my hands.. although it was in proper hands, no one wants it to be that way.. atleast now am contolling it.. but things are jus not going the way intended.. listening to "to live is to die" by metallica now is jus so soothing to the ears..

as i say tata.. i leave u pondering over these lyrics from motherjane..


We’ve all wondered why
Destiny picked us to cry
Why faith has to be tested,
And life doesn’t turn out the way intended

some bunch of information:
1.garbage
2.funny story

lesser known facts of the day coz research says so..
1. Men are more emotional than women after marriage.. (/* so are u gals happy??)
2. Men are efficient shoppers than women (/* the word is efficient and not addictive)

The Thing That U Should Not Do

Some things are never told in a direct way.. since this being a blog, am forced to tell this in a very indirect way.. its upto you to guess wat all this is.. now the below shit comes from a mahn who hasnt touched blogger for about 50 days.. so think twice before something crops up in your mind..

There are some things which we should not commit to when other people advice that its a bad thing.. but the human mind doesnt think that way.. after all what is good and what is bad is totally relativistic.. your curiosity takes control of your mind and you tend to perform the so called "bad thing".. the problem with me is that kuriosity always kills my kitty.. so there is never a "no" from my side.. n plus wats wrong in being optimistic is my argument.. watever happened has happened.. so here it goes..

The very first reaction would be your heart pounding really fast.. it will be like having high blood pressure.. a moment later you shd be able to feel your heart vibrating.. heart is such a puny organ.. but its a mini nuclear reactor.. it will be like you are holding your heart on your left hand.. next,you could feel your own breath.. the lungs puff up like a big balloon and deflate slowly.. its jus another complicated plastic cover.. your eyes dont obey your commands anymore.. you try to focus.. blurred vision is your result.. you feel that ur vision is blurred, but in reality u can see crystal clear.. this ambiguity in insanity puzzles me.. your legs start to weaken.. it would probably be better to sit down.. but thats where u r wrong.. u shd always stand against it rather than bowing down to it.. u better take control of the situation now.. or else its gonna pull u as quick as quick sand.. the meltdown starts now.. u feel that ur neck is shrinking.. ur jaws are totally hollow.. u could even touch ur voicebox with ur dry tongue.. ur lips were never so dry.. u try to make it moist by licking it with ur tongue.. another wasteful effort of rubbing sandpaper against sandpaper.. ur mouth is a mini sahara desert with not even a single oasis.. the clock is ticking.. the mind wanders.. the movie buff in u makes u think that u r "The One"(Arrgh.. metallica again).. u tend to think that u are capable of controlling anything with your mind.. u soon find out that even ur body parts are refusing to oblige.. ur alterego crops up and says "hey.. we aint in any matrix and u aint the one".. reality has hit hard on you.. u have become prey to the predator.. the scavengers are performing the last funeral of ur mind..elsewhere, ur lips are now like leeches stuck onto the epidermal aberrations.. even they might fall off any second owing to the scarcity of water.. the quench of water thirst is ur priority among other thirsts.. alas!!.. a water bottle with water in it.. u gulp down water very quickly as if u r seeing it after a long time.. but wait.. something's different.. the water seems to be taking a stroll along the walls of the esophagus.. its even traveling along the gastric walls..u could feel the length of the esophagus and the size of ur stomach at the same time.. its a beautiful feeling.. with so much good, comes bad.. in the end, all you can do is vomit which is an obvious outcome of a body-mind coordination failure..

P.S: thanks goku and mj.. thank u for letting me do this..
P.P.S: Am back.. time is wat i need to catch up with all your blogs..

boozy booze booze.. hardy harr harr..

Its been very long.. time flew.. now am back to being vetti.. got a lot of stories and experiences to share..
to start with, lemme tell u that i got placed in CTS.. something expected to happen.. am digressing.. more on the placement later.. a week back, i was damn busy.. i had my last 2 exams.. i had to teach mama for all his arrears.. and important of all i had to help raghu(best friend,ex- roomie and architecture student) with his model.. i had to make his whole site plan while he is in charge of the building.. of course, he was the main authority who explained me what i had to do.. sundar was kind enough to help a bit coz he was also making another model.. the model turned out to be great.. much better than our expectations.. this was a tough one coz it was a hilly slope.. i'll upload the photos later.. the archi guys were very pleased that their models were completed in time..  so they offered a booze party.. we gladly accepted coz we're not stupid to let down a good offer.. the menu being..

1 DSP black (a blend of whisky and scotch)
1 smirnoff green apple flavoured vodka (TIP: never mix this with lemony lemon sprite)
1 haywards 5000 beer (for the beer lover sundar)
of course 3 packs of cigarettes (1 black, 1 classic, 1 flake.. see there is black in everything..)
2 bottles of sprite
2 packs of kurkure
2 packs of haldirams aloo bhujia

now there were totally 8 guys.. the archi guys kindled their creativity yet again and made the environment dimmer.. it was a computer monitor lit party.. one shd speculate that the above mentioned items are quantitatively less for professionals.. one archi guy had no mood.. one was flat after 2 pegs of vodka.. other said he drank in the afternoon and was in no mood.. raghu said that he was fed up with drinkin.. so he had only 2 pegs.. ela stuck onto the fact that he didnt have anything for dinner n so he too lessened himself.. he had 5 pegs i think.. the other archi guy had 6 pegs i think.. urs truly drinks.. but is not that much into it..  so only 4 pegs..(see.. very less).. everyone was in their conscience except the great sundar.. he drank the whole bottle of beer.. 3 pegs of vodka.. 6 pegs of black.. the point to be noted is that everything was consumed in raw form.. no ADULTeration.. thats it.. he found the stairway to heaven.. a few more pegs.. he would have even touched the lotus feet of god.. initially he was dancing to the songs that were being played.. tired he sat down.. started to tell philosophies(read: blog posts for the author).. pretending myself to be a sith lord.. i say..
"Learn to know the Dark Side of the Force.. coz only then u can truly realise urself and ur potential"
lemme tell u abt the booze law..
"Only booze can make one go high for a sufficiently long time so that one starts to think out of the box "
a corollary might be
"Alcohol gives you wisdom which you thought never existed in you"
This owes to the simple fact that u lose ur mind for the time being.. u tend to be open-minded.. i feel this state is everyone's true nature..

Most of the alcohol talks would be about girls, how fucked up their life is or about their field of study(eg. engineering).. but we are a different branch in the same crooked tree.. we talk about philosophy and analyse people's character in the weirdest ways possible.. sundar started off by advicing that we shouldnt forget our parents after we start earning.. ela got bored and escaped.. the remaining me and raghu are natural good listeners.. so he talked and we listened.. raghu was totally steady.. whereas i was a bit shaky.. i still cant remember topic shifts.. from parents it went to western culture.. dunno how.. then indian culture.. would u believe if i tell u that the real blog post starts now only..

so.. he put forth the question.. do u think whether the parenting practices followed in western culture are justified.. letting children choose their own choices creating a barrier in the parent- child relationship.. he was supporter of indian culture.. his argument was immature(shall i say) considering the fact that he is still not married(lol) and his poor knowledge about parenting practices in the western culture.. am not taking any side.. every culture has its own pros and cons.. whats ur say in this..

this is running like a mega serial.. am stopping this..

P.S: Booze yet again tomo.. cmon i got a job.. bring on the heavy artillery..
P.P.S: finally am goin home.. i can hear chennai screaming "come to papa"

SOIN: just not SO IN

I open my blogger to read all ur posts.. and i noticed soin had posted something.. i just opened it in a new tab and waited for all my tabs to open.. when i was reading the first post.. i happen to notice something.. it was not the usual "Post not found" sign..  the sign was a bit awkward.. It read "blog not found".. so i thought blogger is playing tricks with me again.. and so i refreshed the page.. the same thing again.. finding it a little hard to digest, i closed the tab and typed the address in a new tab.. same thing again.. it was then that i realised the idiot had done it for real.. these were the same words that were running through my mind..

idiot
stupid
fucker
a-hole
mothafucka

these are for the brain that generated the thought to delete the blog..

naye
panni
waatha
mairu
"vengayam"

these are for obeying the brain's commands..

If i had known that he was gonna do this.. i would have thrown lyrics such as these at him..

"So precious, yet surreal
 Blog's a onetime deal
With a delicious dark appeal
And a non-religious kind of zeal"

but a helpless me was sleeping.. that which has happened cannot be undone.. atleast am happy that he kept a backup of it.. hopefully he'll start another one..

so i'll finish this by telling a story which i think he has not said in his blog..

Has anyone wondered how he got the name soin?? Its an interesting story.. i pity myself for remembering it partially.. now his name is vishvak saen.. i think in 8th.. they had a new maths teacher who was a malayali.. when she took the attendance for the first time, she pronounced his name as vishvak soin.. all his friends liked this catchy name so much that he was addressed by this name only.. an incident to prove that his friends dont even remember his real name happened in 11th standard i think.. one of his friends called to his home.. his mom had picked up the phone.. the friend had asked for soin.. his mom's obvious reply was "there is no soin in this house".. the friend tried hard to remember his name and stammered like hell.. his mom cut the call thinking that it was a wrong number..
i just got 1 word to say after all this.. freeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee.......

P.S: I think he is bound to kill me for keeping this mokka title..
P.P.S: as sridhar put it.. and he was finally beaten by a girl..
P.P.P.S: and we're off to nagpur for the CAT..

kitty krushes.. kitty krashes..

U were acting like the dog in tom & jerry
always trying to catch tom as if u had a krush on tom
but what happens when there is no tom
it all comes krashing down like a house of cards..


This has been the headline for the past 3 days.. CAT server crashes rescheduling the dates of many students..
My facebook status read "Am a sadist coz i was happy wen i found out CAT server had crashed".. 4 people liked this.. so all those who went to write the exam and came back not writing it have every right to be pissed off.. as usual we jus have to put the blame on some1.. r u gonna put the blame on IIMs?? wat abt prometric who are responsible for conducting the test?? did u think abt blaming urself?? 
now lets justify.. IIMs have no role in this.. they decided its gonna be an online test and gave it to the prometric guys..now, a server crash happens.. its like a random process.. u cant predict when its gonna happen and also cannot find out y it is happening.. but it happens perfectly at the wrong time.. how many times have we witnessed gmail crashing, blogger crashing.. twitter going bizarrrrk.. and the no donut for u sign.. we do complain at times like those too but not like this.. y is this so important.. coz its life threatening.. now a report said that "the CAT going online has seen a considerable decrease in the number of applicants"
since  this is gonna be the first time CAT is being held online.. the applicants shd hav speculated that things might go wrong.. so to be on the safe side, they should not have chosen the starting dates.. 
but they didnt.. i have a hunch that most of the people who scheduled the starting dates are preparing for CAT for the past 2 years.. hence they will be known as schemers.. everything should go according to their plan.. they planned to give the cat as soon as possible and get over with it.. their failure to notice an imbalance in the system is the root cause for all their misery.. and so even though they are schemers.. they arent jus good in it.. and the house of cards comes crashing down.. and finally they complain about the system.. 
since i dont wanna say the 2 words.. i pity u and recite the following lullaby so that u can have a nice sleep..

“Soft kitty, warm kitty

little ball of fur,

happy kitty, sleepy kitty

purr purr purr”

P.S: My CAT is on dec 3.. n what am i doing?? am analysing fellow cat aspirants.. kya baat hai sirji..

P.P.S:the reason for the crash..[link]

Endless sacrifice

How come 
We dont even talk no more
And you dont even call no more
We rarely keep in touch at all
And i dont even feel the same way 
that it used to be anymore
After all the years we've been down
After all the things we've been through

This aint no how
This bullshit can't be true
We family aint a damn thing changed, unless it's you!



P.S: U shd recognise the first few lines.. if u dont then u can credit me with that..


P.P.S: This poem will make sense who have felt when a close friend aint closer no more..

And justice for all

Today.. an unusual incident happened.. since our cook failed us yet again.. we had to go out for dinner.. so only 5 pple from the gang finally decided to go to vinayak udupi since thats the only bearable south indian restaurant in raipur and since we are getting really really home sick.. jus cant wait for all these exams to get over.. so, the restaurant has 2 big rooms (nothin fancy).. one for self service and the other air conditioned.. since the self service was a bit crowded.. we decided to go for AC.. we entered to find only 1 couple occupying one of the 5 tables present.. they were seated near the door while we went to the far end of the room.. the point of telling this is we could see their faces from all of the seating options available.. now about the couple.. they are ISO 9001:2009 certified unmarried.. i do can say that their ages shd hav been between 25-27.. way older than us.. now am tellin all this just after 2 glances(no closer looks).. the first glance was while entering the room.. let it be a little suspense abt the second glance.. we entered anyway.. as any college gang should be, i think i can accept the fact that we were a teeny weeny bit noisy.. then the thing that should not happen happened.. 


The couple got up from their seats.. shifted to the opposite seats of the same table where we could not see them.. or atleast their faces.. we got totally pissed off.. suddenly one of us(not me) said..
"WTF.. wat indecency did we show.. get up u idiots" (translated to english by the author.. u dont wanna hear the tamil version.. trust me)


We got up from there and left the AC (btw did i say that the AC was not working) room and went to the self service section.. while going away from that room.. we all gave an angry stare (no..not the pathetic stare from yesterday's how i met your mother episode) towards the couple since now they were facing us..


hence, i put forth a question.. Are the couple justified in doing that?? and was our reply enough or do u still think it lacks the force.. please justify yourself..


before u start to comment.. lemme tell u some facts about a gang of boys.. do keep them in mind while u r commenting..
1. A single girl/ a group of girls anywhere - do i need to say yes.. of course bird watching..
2. A couple belonging to the same age sitting anywhere jus talking - maybe yes.. just a curious look to check out the girl..
3. A couple of a little higher age jus talking.- i dont think so.. we always have a lot of options u see..
4. Any unmarried couple doing everything else other than talking - as i said.. curiousity always killed the cat.. its a killing machine pple..it does killing in the name of good..


Its a guy's fault too (in cases 2, 3 & 4).. y does he hav to get pissed off when a total stranger is looking at his girl.. wat could he possibly do.. come into their life and take his girl away from him?? nonsense.. even he would have done bird watching.. relationships,love,sex all start with bird watching.. bird watching is no offence.. the worst part is when they try to tell that we are the indecent ones through their amateur attempts.. looks like we would have to spread the message of pissing them off..


P.S: we ate happily after that..and justice was served(thanks to the justice league).. looks like we set a record for eating a family dosa in less than 1 and a half minutes.. 


P.P.S: this post is totally abt bird watching.. so please dont throw any shit on protection in the society, rapism blah blah..

Eccentricity, smoking, philosophy & grace - Eccentricity

Its like this.. I was born to 2 south indian brahmins who got arrangedly married.. one is from the tirunelveli district and the other from the dharmapuri district in tamilnadu.. but am a true chennaite u see.. born and brought up in chennai.. when u hear someone saying brahmin from tamilnadu.. the following 2 words will automatically click in your mind- Iyers and Iyengars.. the former are the shiva devotees while the latter are my followers(not blog followers).. but i dont belong to either.. am a madhwa.. its actually very hard to explain who a madhwa is..  i can see some "i know" faces.. here it goes.. madhwas are kannada/ marathi speaking brahmins who worship vishnu and his avatars.. they are similar to the iyengars but different.. nw as many might not know, my mother tongue is marathi.. when i came here to raipur, none of the maharashtrians in my college(its an NIT) could understand my marathi.. one sensible fellow said that my marathi was a very true form of marathi used only in literature.. not in speaking.. (all u maharashtrians have polluted ur language).. only then did i get the urge to call up my dad and ask the obvious question "how come our mother tongue is marathi.. none of my friends can understand it".. he was dumbstruck and gave the answer "my mom and dad taught me that only.. i taught u the same.. i think we are the remnants of the royal family of shahjahan".. then it led to a series of unanswered questions.. then i did the obvious.. googled it..
these are the exact lines from wiki..
"Madhwas (or Madhvas) is the name given to a community of Brahmin caste of India, whose members follow the doctrine of Dvaita or Dualism as codified by Acharya Madhwa.
Madhwas are Vaishnavites (Vaishnavism). Kannada is the mother tongue of majority of members of this community today in India. They live mainly in Karnataka and a significant number live in Tamil Nadu, Maharashtra and Andhra Pradesh. The influx of Madhwas into Tamil Nadu is thought to have happened during and after the Maratha conquest of Thanjavur."

Even wiki doesnt mention anything abt marathi.. but it surely cleared something.. now y the hell did the marathas invade thanjavur.. leaving that aside.. since even my mom and dad knew only the speaking part.. i too knew that only.. i cant read or write marathi.. so marathi was totally restricted to home.. a lot of my school friends thought i was a tamil iyengar.. i was having a lot of interest in the language tamil.. somehow i feel its more poetic than english and hindi.. u can manipulate the language in many ways.. the language is indeed special with its rich literature.. my dad is highly fluent in tamil.. he had this perfectly inspiring tamil teacher prototype in his schooling.. i envy him for that.. but i hate him for 1 thing which he enforced upon me.. knowing so much about the tamil language, he forced me to take HINDI as my second language in school.. he even denied me to switch to tamil when i was in 6th.. he always said that he had a "hunch" that i would be going to north india.. His hunch became true.. but still hate hate hate.. and thus i know to read write and speak both tamil and hindi..
Reverting back to the madhwas, since they too are brahmins.. implies no meat and only vegetarian.. and so i thought egg wouldn't be a problem.. and thus, me in 8th standard (only then did i get the courage) ate an omelette from a roadside shop and happily went home after school.. yours truly being so proud for doing such a brave thing told this to his mom.. i got frightened after seeing my mom's reaction.. she caught me by the ear and pulled me to the bathroom directly.. made me wait for 5 mins.. went somewhere and got some big leaves (dunno which plant) and some mustard.. told me that i had to keep the leaves on my shoulders with the mustard over the leaves.. and then pour water over my head until the leaves fall down.. this is some kinda tradition to be done after a sinful act.. that was the day i decided "i will live my life breaking each and every damn rule in the book.. break the rules was my policy".. due to the high dedication i had towards my policy.. i feel proud to say that i have eaten chicken and fish.. since am not a natural canine.. i feel it a bit hard with the bones.. boneless works fine..
thus my eccentricity is born..

P.S: the tiltle has been shamelessly edited from the foo fighters album "echoes, silence, patience & grace"
P.P.S: if any of u know any good looking madhwa girl.. feel free to hook her up with me..

mokka mohan

got these 2 as mail.. so jus sharing.. this is all i can do with my hectic schedule.. do promise to come back and complete the unfinished posts.. for the time being, hav a good laugh people..

MAIL 1:

Scenario 1
Two guys are fighting and a third guy comes along, then a fourth and
they start arguing about who's right. You are in Kolkata

Scenario 2
Two guys are fighting and a third guy comes along, sees them and walks
on. That's Mumbai

Scenario 3
Two guys are fighting and a third guy comes along & tries to make
peace. The first two get together & beat him up. That's Delhi

Scenario 4
Two guys are fighting. A crowd gathers to watch. A guy comes along and
quietly opens a chai-stall. That's Ahmedabad.

Scenario 5
Two guys are fighting and a third guy comes he writes a software
program to stop the fight. But the fight doesn't stop b'cos of a bug
in the program. That's Bangalore

Scenario 6
Two guys are fighting. A crowd gathers to watch. A guy comes along and
quietly says that "AMMA" doesn't like all this nonsense. Peace comes
in. That's Chennai.

Scenario 7
Two guys are fighting. Both of them take time out and call their
friends on mobile. Now 50 guys are fighting. You are DEFINITELY IN
HARYANA.

MAIL 2:

This was the title.. " People with weak heart don’t see….plzzzzz :(((" when i see titles like these.. i directly delete the mail.. but my mouse wasnt obeying my commands.. the mail opened.. and i was surprised not to see any brutal images.. but instead saw this..

Festival	Date	Day
SANKRANTI	14-Jan-2010	Thursday
REPUBLIC DAY	26-Jan-2010	Tuesday
MILAD-UN-NABI	27-Feb-2010	Saturday
UGADI	16-Mar-2010	Tuesday
GOOD FRIDAY	02-Apr-2010	Friday
MAY DAY	01-May-2010	Saturday
INDEPENDENCE DAY	15-Aug-2010	Sunday
KUTUB-E-RAMZAN	10-Sep-2010	Friday
GANESH CHATURTHI	11-Sep-2010	Saturday
GANDHI JAYANTI	02-Oct-2010	Saturday
VIJAYA DASHAMI / DASSHERA	17-Oct-2010	Sunday
DEEPAVALI / BALI PADYAMI	05-Nov-2010	Friday
BAKRID	17-Nov-2010	Wednesday
MOHORRAM	17-Dec-2010	Friday
CHRISTMAS	25-Dec-2010	Saturday

Gone with the wind part-1

my blogger timeline is somewhat similar to the indian trains.. its running a little late.. jus 1 week.. we regret for the inconvenience caused..
I went to nashik last week for my IAF exam(EKT).. the IAF were kind enough to change my centre from nagpur to nashik.. 5 eager people decided not to go since nashik was far away and u wont be getting a confirmed ticket on the outrageously stupid howrah-mumbai route.. 2 of them were uncertain and so wen urs truly decided to take the risk, they joined in.. so the journey started with 2 quite unknown acquaintances from raipur.. since all this was decided 2 days before the exam, u could expect the kind of train journey that is supposed to happen.. i'll reserve that for part-2.. the train reached on time unexpectedly at 3.30am ruining a poor man's sleep.. the cold did its job of completely waking us up.. we had to go to the air base at ojhar village.. 35 kms from the station.. the directions in the hall ticket were clear.. we had to take a bus to the central bus stand and then another bus to ojhar.. for once i had suggested to eat something and start.. but they wouldnt listen.. so we went to the central bus stand on a bus which was at 3.45.. so early.. not a shop open at the CBS.. no tea even.. obviously i had backup and went for plan -B.. while they dont adhere to the backup i happily enjoyed the cold weather.. this next bus came at 4.30 and it was a special one that am gonna dedicate the following short story to it..

"tickets in his pocket.. all set for the 28 km drive to the village.. a bus in which the driver had his own cabin.. his earphones plugged.. it was a deserted national highway.. no vehicles from the opposite direction.. no high beam headlights..the bus was a one man army plunged into darkness.. suddenly the bus went into stealth mode.. a strange coincidence that a particular song started playing on his mobile.. for once, he thought "fear of the dark" from iron maiden was not the situation song.. his legs shook,heart trembled, ear drums vibrated.. is it the song?? is it the cold?? it was the darkness.. he learned to fly in a sitting posture"

we reached so early that all we could see was pple jogging even in the cold weather.. helplessly in hunger, we sat there till 7am..

A few snaps..

at the station..

the CBS @ 4..

the driver's cabin..

 

am on a high pple coz am a drug addict..

the gentleman is back.. note the formals ur honour(i changed u know)

P.S: it seems that i've been writin so many part-1s and not writin part-2s.. will try to post them as soon as i can..

P.P.S: it also seems that i've been writing very long posts highly contrary to my usual writing style.. please bear with me as am preparing for my semester exams..

God hates us all - part 2

Came here with a mindset to write a totally enjoyable post.. but after reading soin's thrash metal version.. am all charged up to write mine.. so soin had put the blame on the ancestors.. true it is their fault too.. but i had something different in mind already and i dont wanna change that.. so it shd be obvious that am gonna put the blame on god.. all this reservation started on the basis of caste.. caste means religion.. and all this religion stuff attributes to god.. if i had a time machine, i'll go to the time period to kill whichever stupid fuck got the idea of a supernatural power controlling everything.. this guy was the cause for every fuckin shit that is going on now.. this might not be a big problem in other countries.. but in a highly diverse country such as India, one god itself is tuf to handle.. a lot of gods.. gimme a break..so am basically against each and every religion in this fuckin world.. thats y the basic difference between people occurs..

and so ntpc came to our coll.. interviewed 10.. took the obvious 6 outta which one guy was a sc who mugged the about me column.. the worst part is that the about me for him was written by another guy.. totally unworthy idiot who is goin to be the fate of india's largest power sector company.. so rather than putting the blame directly on god.. i question all those "believers" whether is it appropriate to believe in god at times like these wen u feel god solely is responsible for all this utter chaos.. i cant call myself a perfect athiest even.. coz i may even be forced to believe in god in severe circumstances jus longing for a miracle to happen.. so even considering that am a theist it is instances such as now that force my comple mind to question his very existence..

the metal paradox

Its been very long that i wrote a post on music.. but this upcoming post wont amuse the readers who dont dig into metal music.. so to do justice i present u with my gtalk status for the past 2 days..
""maiden is god" are the words of a non-satanic atheist.."
for those who dont understand what maiden is.. Iron maiden is a legendary music band in the heavy metal genre.. recently i've been totally addicted to their songs.. when i updated this as my status.. there started a conversation between me and another fellow metal fan..
he asked me whether this was a paradox.. so is this a paradox?? i replied "maybe.. its complicated.."
now, the genres death metal and norwegian black metal are based on satanism.. although iron maiden are not totally satanic.. some of their songs are.. coming to the statement.. it literally means "a band which worships satan is god".. or rather.. "satan is god".. theoretically, satan is totally evil and god is totally pure/good.. but the world we live in has good and bad in it.. although good and bad are relativistic.. subjecting a person to physical torture/harm(*1*) is bad if u ask me..its not that the bad guys worship satan and the good guys worship god.. the bad guys also worship god..(*2*) people have questions such as "if god exists, then y do all the bad things happen".. well i believe the think which we call god is really a hybrid of the theoretical satan
and the theoretical god.. it is this GOTAN who we call god.. gotan is assigned to do one job.. to maintain the balance between good and bad.. too much good is bad.. too much bad is also bad..

*1*- only after implementing the physical stress, u can apply the psychological,sexual and other kinds of stress.. so i guess this is primary..
*2*- good guys worshipping satan are hard to find.. i'll let u know wen i find out

P.S:- any fans of dragonball-z here??

Coming to the music part which was the main reason for this post.. the following should be a treat for the metalheads.. not my creation.. found it sumwhere.. so just sharing.. it jus describes the various metal genres..

HEAVY METAL: The protagonist arrives on a Harley, kills the dragon, drinks a few beers, and bones the princess.

POWER METAL:The protagonist arrives riding a white unicorn, escapes from the dragon, saves the princess and makes love to her in an enchanted forest.

THRASH METAL:The protagonist arrives, fights the dragon, saves the princess and fucks her.

DEATH METAL:The protagonist arrives, kills the dragon, fucks the princess and kills her, then leaves.

BLACK METAL:The protagonist arrives at midnight, kills the dragon and impales it in front of the castle. Then he sodomizes the princess, drinks her blood in a ritual before killing her. Then he impales the princess next to the dragon.

DOOM METAL:The protagonist arrives, sees the size of the dragon, and thinks he could never beat him. He gets depressed and commits suicide. The dragons eats his body and the princess as dessert. That's the end of the sad story.

GOTHIC METAL:The princess in a velvet costume starts singing soprano. The protagonist completes the duet by adding the beast part, while the dragon plays the flute. Suddenly the dragon swallows the flute and accidently scorches the beauty and the beast and suffocates to death. All their souls are damned in hell for all eternity.

PROGRESSIVE METAL:The protagonist arrives with a guitar and plays a solo of 26 minutes. The dragon kills himself out of boredom. The protagonist arrives at the princess' bedroom, plays another solo with all the techniques and tunes he learned in the last year of the conservatory. The princess escapes looking for the HEAVY METAL protagonist.

GLAM METAL:The protagonist arrives, the dragon laughs at the guy's appearance and lets him enter. He steals the princess' make-up and tries to paint the castle in a beautiful pink color.

NU METAL:The protagonist arrives in a run down Honda Civic and attempts to fight the dragon but he burns to death when his moronic baggy clothes catch fire.

The difference in spark

This was my first diwali away from home.. or rather a bachelor's thala deepavali..(thala deepavali is the first diwali celebrated by a married male/female)..as most of u might know that my native place is chennai(in south india) and i am currently in raipur(central india).. In chennai i have my family.. and in raipur, me and my friends live in a separate house.. In this post, am mainly gonna talk abt the differences i noticed in the way the festival is celebrated in the 2 parts or rather gonna say what i have done during diwali..

Read the corresponding points back to back..

In Chennai..
1. 10PM-3AM:- I would have definitely slept..

2. 3.15AM:- I go to the streets and burst a 200 wala to show everyone that i've woken up and to wake all the sleeping beauties.. 15 mins are for just lingering in my sleep.. or atleast until dad comes and says "go and wake everyone up.."

3. 3.30AM:- This is what exactly happens.. and i dunno the name of this proceeding.. my mom spreads a mat on the floor.. me, my sis and my dad sit on it.. my mom goes inside the pooja room and brings the necessary "godly" stuff.. she applies turmeric and kumkum on all our foreheads.. and pours a little oil on our heads.. my dad gives us 1 rupee coins and we have to put it on the plate which contains all the godly stuff.. my mom takes it eventually.. then comes the best part.. i get an oil head massage from my dad.. i wish i can sleep again.. eventually i take a bath.. all this would have been done by at the max 4'o clock..

4. 4AM:- I put on my new clothes and tease my little sister for a while.. then go out with a few crackers and wish everybody out there a happy diwali.. everybody.. from beggars to pple travelling in cars.. the TV would be on and instrumentals on a full flow.. my mom would have put her usual ettu pulli kolam.. nothin fancy.. a simple rangoli..

5. 5AM:- The street is probably flooded now.. the little kids are highly notorious since they go in bunches and plan wickedly and choose their target carefully.. unfortunately.. urs truly was once a target of these kids.. (reason: urs truly has once lit 5 atom bombs in succession and then threw the 6th atom bomb in the air.. they were jealous) So.. wen i was close to the gate,they had me distracted by some other kid who made me to watch him.. while i was watching him 2 more kids lighted 2 kuruvi vedis(a fairly good explosive) right near my ears and stuck them onto the gate.. n the two explosives blasted at the same time making urs truly deaf for almost 5 mins.. the kids executed the plan perfectly.. no physical damage done but completely deaf for 5 mins.. all i could see was them laughing around.. i still havent taken the revenge on those naughty lil pests yet..

6. 6AM:- My dad is now ready and would do some risky stuff to enthrall the kids.. he would hold the 200 wala in his hands until it comes to the hand.. funny that i've never tried that even once..

7. 6.30AM:- The munching starts.. when i was small they threatened me to wash my hands every time before i lay upon my hand on the food.. so i would wash my hands and then eat.. now tht i hav bcum lazy and more brainy.. wen i go into the kitchen.. my mom stuffs the food in my mouth and i continue with the fireworks.. ;)

8. 7AM:- Me and dad would start watching TV and all the crap morning interviews with celebrities they put on.. the munching is still on pple.. and then it is TV(solomon papaiya) and TV(matinee movie) and more TV(evening movie) till evening.. at times fireworks.. and the great feast.. i may even go outside to meet my friends..

9. 7PM:- after 7AM its directly to 7PM.. we light the lamps all around the house.. and am off to fire rockets and a lil bit of fancy stuff to light up the night sky.. we sleep off finally..

In Raipur..
1. 12AM- 3AM:- Sleeping.. whats that??.. first of all this time was a lil bit different.. it was soin's bday.. so the usual party happened at 12AM.. we gave him gpl and ate his awesome bday cake as if we were scavengers.. u can check out that awesome bday cake here.. After that we start playing cards till about 3 AM.. every1 else slept..

2. 3AM:- We are totally stuffed with the 4 pound cake.. lazily me, soin and ela plan to get up, go to the street in an effort to wake all our neighbours.. we ignite the 100 wala.. the sound wasnt much but it shd have been enuf to wake em all.. our efforts go in vain.. not a single soul comes out for the next 1 hr..

3. 4AM:- No special religious proceeding.. we dont have a pooja room coz all are not of the same religion.. none of the hindus here are so religious where as the christians here are so religious.. neways.. no oil bath.. forget oil bath.. i didnt take bath the whole day.. soin took bath in the evening.. hari and rajesh perhaps took bath in the morning at maybe 10..

4.5AM:- By now Soin would have got around 4 calls from his home whereas i got 1 call through which i sufficed the need.. Since no-one woke up on our street.. we went to the tea shop in an effort to see pple awake on the auspicious day.. the chai wala was there.. we wished him and while happily drinking chai.. the rangoli-wala caught my eye.. took a few random colours and went home..

5. 6.30AM:- There are absolutely no kids still..

6. 7AM:- I really missed my dad.. but friends are the best substitute one can get.. me and ela clean the area in front of the gate in order to create more space for the rangoli..

7. 8AM:- Interestingly.. we just had 2 packets of sweets and 2 mixtures for the entire day.. not the kinda munching u had expected..

8. 8.30AM- 11.30 AM:- We saw the nayanthara interview on suntv.. one hell of a comedy.. the tattoo controversy was totally uncalled for.. then we saw the soloman papaya patti manram.. it was disappointing.. still not even a single cracker sound.. pissed off me and soin went off to bed..

9. 4.30PM:- Straight to work on the rangoli.. we didnt want some fancy design.. we needed a clear cut concept(alliteration aah..) it was rajesh's idea finally that came into play.. we finished with rangoli and then started the lamps(vilakku).. decorated the whole house with lamps.. u can check every stage of the rangoli and the decoration here..

10. 6.30PM:- Night is when the party began.. man u shd have seen this.. we were totally in love with the night sky.. All the rich pple show off with their money.. they burst only 10000 walas and fancy things that go and burst in the sky.. it totally rocked.. we bursted our small pile of crackers and went roaming around the city.. we took fotos of all the beautifully decorated houses and the rangoli.. our eyes took the pictures of all the good looking girls neatly dressed up..(wat can i say.. we're still bachelors..) in short.. it was a treat to our eyes..

P.S: I dedicate this post to my house mates.. rather close friends and fellow bloggers soin and hari.. if u wish to then plz take the award..

P.P.S: soin's real name is vishvak saen.. betcha lot of pple wouldnt know this..